In my family, I was the only person with curls. My father, brother, and mother all had straight hair, which left me struggling to maintain the perfect curly hair routine.
The DILEMMA
Growing up, my hair changed patterns constantly. As a child, I had type 2a hair—light waves that were easy to maintain and brush out. But as I transitioned out of elementary school, my hair started to get curlier, and I didn’t know how to take care of it. My mother never had curly hair, so neither of us really understood how to manage mine. I resorted to brushing it out every morning before school, styling it with a neon pink headband. Every day. Just the thought of it now sounds terrifying.
By middle school, my curls had gotten tighter (type 3a), especially after puberty hit. The combination of not establishing a strong, suitable hair care routine, shampooing every day, and going to bed with my hair wet—well, it wasn’t ideal. My hair was drier, messier, and more difficult to manage. I only felt beautiful when I straightened it, which was easier to maintain. This was a trap I continuously fell into throughout high school.
In high school, I started finding ways to style my hair without using heat. A braid or a claw clip became my go-to, and I rarely wore my hair down. If I ever did wear my curly hair out for school, my close friends would comment that they didn’t even know I had curls.
It wasn’t until I decided, “I want out,” that things started to change.
And Just Like That, I Decided to Wear My Hair Down
In my junior year of high school, I came to a realization: If I get keratin treatment now, I’ll be happy! But then I thought, If I get keratin now, my curls will never hold as tightly as they once did. Thankfully, this was my first moment of wisdom! But, as wisdom often does, it didn’t last long (thank you, universe).
With that bit of wisdom, I knew I had to embrace my curly locks. One of my biggest inspirations was Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. In shows like Gossip Girl and movies like Clueless and Legally Blonde, the beautiful and confident protagonists were always portrayed with straight hair. But Carrie Bradshaw was different—she was beautiful and confident, with curly hair.
Society used to look down on curly hair, labeling it as wild, trashy, and lacking elegance. But Carrie embraced her curls, turning them into something chic, sexy, and sophisticated.
Using this as retrospect I prioritized the health of my hair, cut back on using heat, and took greater pride in wearing my curly locks. I followed these four rules to achieve the highest form of self-confidence and reassurance in my hair.
ACHIEVE THE CARRIE BRADSHAW HAIR
Have a Firm Routine That Works for You
Depending on your hair type, you may have a different routine than mine—or, frankly, no routine at all. I use five products that always guarantee nice, shiny locks.
Curling Cream
I recommend this as your first step. I like to use both a light curling cream and a heavier one, combining them to create a medium texture that gives structure to my curls without making them too heavy or too light. I apply it by raking it into my hair.
Mousse
As my second step, I take mousse and scrunch it into my hair. I apply two dollops to my hand and scrunch it from my roots to the ends, massaging it into my scalp to provide more volume.
Styling Gel
Next, I use a styling gel. With this gel, I rake it through my hair and then scrunch it to keep the curls intact. Be careful not to use too much, as this combined with too much mousse will make your hair look crunchy (and no one wants that).
Hair Oil
Lastly, I apply hair oil to my roots. I usually skip this step, as I don't seem to need to add shine to my hair as often as others, but it is the last step in my routine. You can use it to add shine, but be careful to apply only one drop, about the size of a dime, as it can make your hair oily if you add too much.
Here's the catch: it is crucial to apply the products at the right time. If your hair is too dry, it will dry frizzy, even with the products in place. If your hair is too wet, the products will run off as your hair dries (though not much).
My trick is to brush my hair as soon as I get out of the shower, then use a hair towel. By the time I’ve put on my outfit or pajamas, it’s time to take off the hair towel.
Using Oil To Maintain Healthy Hair
While there’s not much evidence that castor oil can make your hair grow faster, it definitely provides the nutrients needed to keep your hair healthy and strong. Castor oil is anti-inflammatory, helping to soothe an irritated scalp. It’s also a natural emollient, meaning it moisturizes and seals natural oils into the hair. Many hair enthusiasts claim it will make your hair grow faster, but there’s no harm in trying.
There are two ways I add oil to my hair. First, I occasionally use castor oil on my roots. Simply massage the castor oil into my scalp after brushing out my dry hair, and wait about thirty minutes before hopping into the shower for my regular wash routine. Second, when my hair feels a bit dry, I brush it out and apply oil to my roots while tying my hair into a braid to lock in moisture.
Avoid Shampooing Too Often
From personal experience, when I was playing tennis six times a week, I often washed my hair every day and went to sleep with my hair wet. My hair was at its driest when I was shampooing daily. To restore the shine, I began washing my hair only two to three times a week, making sure to braid it when I worked out. If I felt I had sweated a lot, I would wash it in the shower by applying conditioner but skipping the shampoo, to avoid stripping the natural oils from my hair.
Use A Satin Pillowcase To Sleep
Using a satin pillowcase helps reduce frizz, making it easier to style your hair in the morning, and it also prevents hair loss overnight, compared to using a cotton pillowcase.
Now, this doesn't mean you have to refrain from using heat, as I often do use heat (about once to three times a month), but do not neglect your natural hair as that is when your hair will look it best!
Having curly hair is not a curse, but a blessing. Learn to love it and it will be the best your hair has ever looked!
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